Category Archives: Calamity

Prepare: Next NERT Training Session Starts in June

Posted on May 24, 2012 by

As wonderful as our beloved chert is, Bernal Heights is not impervious to earthquakes. When the Big One comes, professional emergency personnel will be overwhelmed, and the rest of us will have to work together to stay safe and begin … Continue reading →

Posted in Calamity, Events | Leave a comment

BREAKING: Power Failure Cripples Cortland!

Posted on May 22, 2012 by

** Breaking News ** Breaking News ** Breaking News ** The electricity went down on Cortland this morning, and as of 9:35 this morning… it’s still down. Bernalwood sources report that caffeine delivery systems are inoperative in cafes up and down the … Continue reading →

Posted in Calamity, Cortland | 2 Comments

Last Vestiges of Infamous Nasser Market Disappear

Posted on May 15, 2012 by

Neighbor Lessley brings us this update on the evolution of the former Nasser Market space on the corner of Crescent and Anderson: Nasser Market, the infamous Crescent Ave. liquor store that inspired a 2008 murder and served as a drug … Continue reading →

Posted in Business, Calamity, Merchants, Real Estate | 13 Comments

Community Meeting to Halt Illegal Dumping, Tuesday Evening

Posted on May 14, 2012 by

In response to the recent, wretched spate of illegal dumping incidents on Bernal Hill the San Francisco Department of Public Works has joined forces with the Police to hold a community meeting TOMORROW, May 15, at 7 pm at the SFPD’s Ingleside … Continue reading →

Posted in Calamity, Crime, Events | 1 Comment

Chaos on Precita as Speeding Car Flips Over on Saturday

Posted on April 23, 2012 by

Some of you may have noticed all the commotion in North Bernal late Saturday afternoon. There were a lot of sirens, and the thump-thump-thump of the Bernalwood ShadowTraffic helicopter hovering overhead. Most unhappy of all were those motorists who tried … Continue reading →

Posted in Calamity, Cars | 6 Comments

Local TV News Covers Illegal Garbage Dumping in Bernal

Posted on February 16, 2012 by

The TV people from CBS5 Eyewitness News saw the Bernalwood story this week about the problem we face with sleazy contractors and other forms of human lowlife dumping huge piles of trash at the foot of Bernal Hill. CBS5 sent … Continue reading →

Posted in Bernal Hill, Calamity, Crime, Media | 10 Comments

Another *&^%$#@!!! Dumping Incident on Bernal Hill

Posted on February 13, 2012 by

If you wander up to the Folsom Gate on Bernal Hill this morning, you will be greeted by this awful pile of trash dumped there by a thoughtless douchebag.  Our vigilant reporter on the hill says: It’s now time for … Continue reading →

Posted in Bernal Hill, Calamity, Crime | 26 Comments

And Now, Your Deepest, Darkest Nightmare…

Posted on January 18, 2012 by

Eeeeeeeeeeeek! It’s a image of hell! A full-color vision of the darkest nightmare that lurks in every Bernalista’s deepest subconscious.  A photo that could convert even the most laissez-faire YIMBY into a foaming NIMBY reactionary. And even more frightening: This … Continue reading →

Posted in Calamity, Found Things | 3 Comments

Reminder: Bernal Hill is Not Your *&^%*@! Trash Dump

Posted on January 6, 2012 by

Well, this sucks, yet again. Our agent at Bernalwood’s hillside observation post reports: Another trash dumping incident on Bernal Hill this morning. Disgusting.   UPDATE: Here is a video from the crime scene: PHOTO: Folsom Gate, this morning

Posted in Bernal Hill, Calamity, Crime | 17 Comments

… In Which I Am Revealed to Be Only Marginally Prepared for a Very Big Earthquake

Posted on December 7, 2011 by

A few months ago, I volunteered myself, my daughter, and my home to serve as on-camera crash-test dummies for a series of earthquake-preparedness videos produced by Totally Unprepared, a public-awareness organization which describes itself as… … what happens when you … Continue reading →

Posted in Accident or Ill Fortune, Calamity, Geology and Seismology, Infrastructure, Media | 10 Comments

Great Bernal Sinkhole of 2011 Becomes Much Much Greater

Posted on November 1, 2011 by

Sure, it was a funny little joke at first. A pothole on Ellert near the intersection of Bennington opened a few weeks ago, and a neighborhood wag dubbed it “The Great Bernal Sinkhole of 2011.” Well, there’s actually some truth … Continue reading →

Posted in Calamity, Infrastructure | 14 Comments

Wicked Witch Meets Sudden Demise in Pre-Halloween Crash

Posted on October 28, 2011 by

Tragedy struck on a recent evening in Bernal Heights when a wicked witch perished in an aeronautical mishap. Neighbors reported hearing the witch cackling as she flew on her signature broom, before her cruel taunt was cut short by an … Continue reading →

Posted in Calamity, Found Things | 3 Comments

Lotus Garden Vietnamese Restaurant Set to Reopen

Posted on October 14, 2011 by

And now for some tasty news. Remember that terrible three-alarm fire that devastated a building on Mission Street near Valencia last April? And how the damage forced the closure of the much-loved Lotus Garden Vietnamese restaurant? At the time, if … Continue reading →

Posted in Calamity, Food and Drink | 2 Comments