Category Archives: Found Things

Elsie Street Library Opens Mysterious Main Branch

Neighbor Sharon found a secret public library tucked away along a leafy portion of Elsie Street north of Cortland. She has no idea how or when it got there: I’ve always thought of Bernal as “Brigadoon” — a small town atop … Continue reading

Posted in Food and Drink, Found Things | 9 Comments

All the Clichés About Bernal Heights Are All True

Bernal neighbor and celebrity writer Chris Colin shared this photo today, as captured on Cortland. He writes: Bernal Heights: just dogs and strollers. Obviously!

Posted in Cortland, Found Things | 11 Comments

Fresh Donuts Come to Bernal Heights (But Taste Kind of Rubbery)

Several readers have written to us recently about new tire-mark “donuts” that have appeared at intersections around Bernal Heights. Last week, your Bernalwood editor was awakened in the middle of the night by the squealing sound of automobile tires — … Continue reading

Posted in Cars, Found Things | 19 Comments

Bizarre Tree Snake Stalks Pedestrians on Bennington

Neighbor Sharon reports that she was very nearly licked by a strange tree snake on Bennington near Cortland. Born of neckties, apparently, the creature appears freakish, but conspicuously friendly.

Posted in Found Things | 5 Comments

Bernal Neighbors Receive “Parking Tickets of Love”

Via Neighbor Andy, we bring this cheerful news that the SFVDA — the San Francisco Valentine’s Day Agency — is currently ticketing vehicles in Bernal Heights with “Parking tickets of Love.” Awwwww.  Happy Valentines Day, Bernal Heights!

Posted in Cars, Found Things | 14 Comments

Bikini Jogger Spotted, Briefly, by Puzzled Bernal Neighbor

This morning brings a fleeting glimpse of Bernal’s fast-moving Bikini Jogger. Neighbor Jonathan logged it: Bernal bikini jogger sighting – 1/28, morning. While starting my car I noticed a yellow blur in the rear view. Puzzlement soon turned to excitement, … Continue reading

Posted in Fashion, Fitness and Exercise, Found Things | 20 Comments

Wine Cereal Now Half Price at Corner Liquor Store

Gentrification Alert! Gentrification Alert! This is how it happens: First comes the ridiculously delicious pizza, then, next thing you know, they’re selling breakfast fare for oenophiles at the liquor store just up the street. Neighbor David, who took this photo … Continue reading

Posted in Found Things | 6 Comments

Yarn-Bombers Stage Daring Infiltration at Precita Playground

Happy New Year! We begin 2014 with news of a surprise direct-action by members of the knitting underground on two trees located at the eastern end of Precita Park, inside the beloved children’s playground. Analysts from the FBI and Knitting … Continue reading

Posted in Activism, Art, Found Things | 17 Comments

There Is a Real Snowman In Precita Park Right Now

Improbable Thing Alert!  Improbable Thing Alert! Neighbor Linda just filed this report from Precitaville: There’s a real snowman in Precita Park, Folsom side! … and indeed there is! Meanwhile, Linda reports that the old truck at Harvest Hills Market on … Continue reading

Posted in Found Things | 6 Comments

Incredible!! Bernal’s Mutant “Mossquatch” Challenges Santa Claus Hegemony

Someone better call Fox News, because the “War on Christmas” has now become an insurgency. Bernalwood interrupts your holiday preparations to bring you this important accouncement: Mossquatch, the mutant Bryophyta-Homo Sapien hybrid who lives inside a meter-reading hole on the corner of … Continue reading

Posted in Found Things, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

ABOMINABLE SNOWMAN SIGHTING IN BERNAL HEIGHTS

Well, we thought nothing could possibly ever top a confirmed Bigfoot sighting in Bernal Heights, but we were so, so wrong… Last night I stepped outside my house for just a minute to grab some party-surplus holiday cookies from the … Continue reading

Posted in Found Things | 3 Comments

Pro Tip: Creating Your Own DIY Standing Desk at a Neighborhood Cafe Is the Definition of Uncool

A Bernal neighbor snapped this rather unfortunate use of a DIY “standing desk” setup at Cafe 78 in La Lengua this afternoon. Pro Tip for all Digital Warriors: Putting a chair on top of a table is never okay. When … Continue reading

Posted in Found Things | 7 Comments

Yarn-Bombed Doggie Heads Generate Bernal Wonder, Mystery

Last weekend, the Citizens of Bernalwood were aflutter about a most uncommon sight found in the upper reaches of Folsom on the north side of Bernal Hill: Three cartoon-mascot dog heads, yarn-bombed inside three colorful, hand-knit cozies. The spectacle was … Continue reading

Posted in Found Things, Uncategorized | 8 Comments